A Beginners Guide to Tropical Living
- Any food left out will be consumed by ants
- Don’t freak out when there is a lizard in the sink (or in your shoe)
- Bugs too small to see with the human eye will bite you – everywhere
- When the forecast says 80% chance of rain that means there is an 80% chance it will rain for 15 minutes
- The roosters are confused
- There will be sand in every crevice and orafice and in your bed and purse and…
- Beer in a can will reach boiling point in about 30 minutes
- Deodorant is useless
- The chirping in the bedroom is not a bird, it’s a gecko
- Falling coconuts give no warning
- Turn the bathroom light on at night so you can see the giant spider
- Tropical fruit will make you regular
- Topless sunbathing requires extra sunscreen
- Time moves at a slower pace than elsewhere in the world
- Get used to people, including yourself, changing clothes on the beach
- Only tourists and school children wear shorts
- Your hair will be frizzy. Period. Don’t fight it.
Just chill brah.
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